Doesn't everyone take pictures of their new running shoes?
During and after my pregnancy, I took about seven months off from running. This qualifies as my longest break from the sport since I started running thirteen years ago. (The only other break was when I had runner’s knee. I took six weeks off that time.)
But I’m back.
In a serious way.
Like “already signed up for races and started training with a plan” serious.
But also “starting out with thirty extra pounds of baby weight” serious.
I’m doing the Muddy Buddy with a friend in three weeks. I’ve always wanted to run through a mud pit (weird desire, I know) and this event gives me the chance to do just that. Not to mention it’s a bike/run relay. With physical challenges.
In order to register for the Muddy Buddy, each team has to come up with a name. Keep an eye out for Team Dirty Moms. You can bet your sweet ass I’ll be writing up a race report for that one.
However, the Muddy Buddy is only a training run for the much larger goal: a half-marathon in September. Specifically, this half-marathon. I was four months pregnant the last half-marathon I ran, so I’m looking forward to being a bit faster this go-around.
Truth be told…I’m looking to be quite a bit faster. Instead of simply aiming to finish the race (which has been my goal many times before), I’m going to attempt to do it in under two hours. Considering my fastest half-marathon time currently stands at 2 hours, 11 minutes, I have some serious work to do.
Which is why I’ve decided to follow a training plan for this race.
Crazy, I know.
It’s been years since I put together an official plan but so far, it’s been working out really well. I like knowing what I need to do every day and not having to think much about it. This plan was inspired by my friend Roni and someone named Hal Higdon. He looks nice enough.
Here is what my training entails…
Monday
Yoga
Tuesday, Thursday
Crossfit
Wednesday
Intervals
Friday
Run
Saturday
Rest
Sunday
Long & Slow Run
I’m in week 3 of my 11 week training program and can honestly say that intervals suck.
Because I’m anticipating a lot of free time from about mid-March through the end of the year, I decided it would be fun to document this year like I did in 2008.
Besides being an amazing challenge in mindfulness, Project 365 forces me to take more pictures while providing me a visual aid to better remember and appreciate each passing day.
But be warned. If the first sixteen days are any indication, it looks like there are many more snow and food shots in the upcoming months.
That’s what I’m left with after running 13.3 miles on single track trails from Snowmass to Aspen this past weekend. The Golden Leaf half-marathon course was amazing, weaving its way through three ski areas, underneath lifts, through aspen groves with changing leaves and over many rocky descents. Although I had my doubts, I really surprised myself with how well I pulled this one off. Especially considering my current state…cough, 4 months pregnant, cough.
The start…
The beginning of this race was harder than any I’ve done before. It was all uphill for the first two miles. And not easy uphills, but really steep climbing. I was happy to see that many people hiked these sections because, as you might’ve guessed, I was one of these people. My strategy for the race was to start slow and the gnarly uphills ensured that I was able to do just that. I distinctly remember looking down at my watch at the end of that first mile and thinking, holy shit, if each mile takes me nineteen minutes, I’m going to be out here for a while.
However, once the race course started leveling out and we made it to the first downhills (around mile 3), things really started getting fun. How can you not love the thrill of running downhill? You let gravity do its thing and try to just concentrate on good foot placement.
The entire race course was on single track trails so it definitely made for a stressful passing situation. Some parts of the trail weren’t wide enough for two people, so if you wanted to pass, you had to go off-trail. Some people refused to make any room for you to pass by them. And then some people got passed and got told they were doing a great job.
Fortunately, I was mostly in the last group.
The middle…
Miles five through nine went by with a blur of steep downhills, muddy water crossings, kicking myself in the ankle and gorgeous surroundings. Mile eight was especially memorable because I tripped and caught myself not once, but three times on the trail. One of those involved hitting my foot against a protruding rock so hard that I needed to walk a bit to make sure I hadn’t done any permanent damage.
The race course was very well-marked and there was never any doubt which way to go. At a few points along the way, you would have the entire trail to yourself, with so much room that it was easy to forget you were running with a thousand other people. But then there were the crowded sections, where you had people right in front of you and right behind. This actually helped me because I was forced to push my pace a bit in order to avoid being run down by those on my tail.
Mile ten was pretty brutal, since we were down and out of the forest, running in the foothills outside of Aspen. It was hot, we were surrounded by brush and there was not a spot of shade to be found. After a little calculation, I think I averaged about a fifteen minute mile through the mid-section of the race.
The end…
The most interesting part of the race happened in the last few miles. In mile eleven, I ran a twelve minute mile. This made me realize that not only was I actually going to finish this thing, but I was cutting time off my miles. This is practically unheard of, for me anyway, in a race of this length. Suddenly, I felt really strong.
Then, as if I wasn’t excited enough about almost being done with the race, can you even guess what happened during the mile 13? No, I didn’t shit my pants. But I did run a ten minute mile. For those fast runners out there, this is still a slow mile. For me, this was phenomenal. My fastest mile of the entire race turned out to be my last mile of the entire race. I’m blaming endorphins.
My husband and I crossed the finish line together, with an official time of 3 hours, 19 minutes. While definitely not my fastest half-marathon time, we did this one as a family. I would recommend this race to anyone looking for a hearty challenge and a very well-organized race. Not to mention a good time…
P. S. Here’s some geeky race nutrition info for those who care about such things…for this race, I carried an emergency GU packet, only to be used in case of dire circumstances. I also cut up a Kashi bar (not necessarily my favorite, but the only ones we had in stock) and put a few pieces in my front pocket. Stopped at all three aid stations and had both water and whatever electrolyte mixture they were serving up…perhaps Cytomax. Also, Adam had a stash of Sport Beans which ended up helping me more than anticipated. I think it’s because I refer to them as magic beans. And they’re in Fruit Punch flavor. They’re like little sport vitamins, a la Super Mario Brothers, and they’re made by Jelly Belly. How can they not be the perfect energy boost during a long run?
P.S.S. Yes, I did give a shout-out to CrossFit Roots during the race. They are my secret training weapon, after all.
Ever since my pregnancy was confirmed, I’ve stopped drinking. Crazy and unheard of, I know.
[It was a whole different story when we were trying to get pregnant as I considered alcohol an important part of the conception process. Many books say the opposite and I'm not a doctor, so don't take my word on the whole drinking/knocked up thing. But it seemed to work for us.]
But not drinking now for a month has taught me some interesting things, in addition to giving me an increased respect for the recovering alcoholics and Mormons out there. Here are a few of the newly sober things I’ve done recently…
Happy hour. Yes, I still go. And yes, to the untrained eye, it may look like I’m still drinking. The trick with this one: mocktails. I’ve discovered that the whole point behind happy hour is the opportunity to catch up with friends. I can do this with a drink in my hand. Especially if that drink looks fruity and fizzy.
Brunch. I’m not sure how you do brunch, but mine always used to include a bloody mary or a mimosa. It turns out that brunch without alcohol is just breakfast. And while still delicious, it does take a bit of the excitement out of it.
BlogHer. This was my first sober conference experience. The fact that there were 2400 women around probably didn’t help with that fact. Nor did the many parties I attended. Or the wine party that I was asked to host in my hotel room. But I made it through. I just didn’t have any really fun pictures as I did in years past. Like the one below, after I drank a bit much in a San Francisco Macy’s department store (at a BlogHer sanctioned event…not just because I had shopping anxiety…):
Concerts. I went to see Built to Spill at an amazing outdoor venue and I’m pretty sure that it was one of the only sober musical experiences I’ve had. With the exception of seeing some classical music a few years back. The show was fun, because I enjoy watching live music, but standing in a crowd of drunken fans wasn’t all it promised. I’d like to say that I’m never going to do that again…although I’m sure I will. Especially since I have tickets to see the Eels in October.
Family visits. My MIL is visiting us for a few weeks. Yes, you read that correctly. And I haven’t had a single drink. Yes, you also read that correctly. Tell me you’re proud of me. Please.
Company lunch at the pub. It broke my heart not to lift a pint with my co-workers at our Friday company lunch outing. Especially because we were dining at the Mountain Sun, my favorite pub & brewery here in town. I had a pint of what they call magic root beer. I raised my glass in a toast. And I may have asked a co-worker to breath on me after they took a swig of beer. Call me the human breathalyzer.
A few key takeaways from this whole sober thing…
I’ve realized that without alcohol, my ability to make small talk has practically shriveled up. I mean, there’s a reason I call alcohol my favorite social lubricant. Not to mention, my patience for putting up with intolerable people has decreased dramatically. Alcohol also helps with that skill. And on top of all that, I can now remember every event very clearly. So if you’re an annoying stranger that I happen to meet, don’t expect me to be charming and witty. Or to forget your face.
I didn’t write this to garner sympathy from anyone. (In fact, my mommyblogging friends are probably laughing at me right now.) But, if you’re wondering how you can support me during this time, I insist on you doing the following four things: Pour a little of your forty on the ground in memory of me. Raise a toast in my, and the baby’s, honor. Do not apologize for drinking in front of me. And, for the love of all that’s Irish, drink one for me.
Because I’m still having fun over here while sober.
Just not as much fun.
And, for the record, not drinking during my pregnancy doesn’t mean that every once in a while, I don’t wish (just a little) that I could be this type of pregnant woman…
Drink up bitches.
{Photo credits: thanks to Caroline Donahue for the photo of me in my drunken mannequin experimentation phase and to Jeff Werner for the pregnant cocktail shot.}
Fortunately, when this happens, I know exactly what I need to do.
Sign up for a physical adventure that costs money.
Why? Well, because once you pay for something, it becomes real. I’ve said that about every race I’ve ever entered. You can talk about training all you want but if you haven’t actually paid money for a race entrance fee, then you’re not really doing the race.
Because you don’t have anything on the line.
Even if you tell yourself differently.
So here I am, in fantastic shape due to CrossFit three times a week, training for a half-marathon at altitude (Aspen, I’m looking at you) and STILL looking to try something new. Because I’m crazy like that. There’s just something in me that longs for the taste of something different.
And that, my friends, is why I’m going to give cyclocross a try.
(Breathe Mom…it’s not motorcross. You don’t have to pray that hard while I do it.)
What is cyclocross?
It’s kinda similar to mountain biking and done on a bike somewhat similar to a road bike, with an obstacle course thrown in for fun. And some mud.
The Rumblings
I started hearing about the Boulder cyclocross scene when I worked with one of the sport’s *loudest* and most enthusiastic evangelists, Greg Keller. His blog about cyclocross, Mud and Cowbells, does a great job of capturing and expressing his passion for the sport. I began to follow his blog, reading about the local cyclocross courses and checking out a few videos.
The sport certainly looked fun. That mud! Those cowbells! And, of course, all that “Hup Hup Buttercup”-hollering and noise-making, which certainly didn’t detract from the good times.
He also goes by Muddy Cowgirl.
But I wasn’t ready to buy a new bike.
Until I got my tax return from Uncle Sam…and heard news that my old friends had just bought a bike shop. Turns out I was ready to invest in a new bike.
The History
My old buddy Dewey hooked me up with a sweet cyclocross setup and it’s wonderful how things come full circle. Honestly, although Greg got me turned on to cyclocross in Boulder, Dewey was the first person to tell me about the sport way back when…in 1996. We used to live in the same neighborhood in Laramie and would ride bikes around town together.
One day, we were tooling around the university when we came to a huge concrete set of steps. Dewey hopped off his bike and gave me my first introduction to cyclocross. He showed me how to throw the bike over my shoulder and then instructed me to run up the steps. I thought he was crazy but I did it. Although slightly painful with my heavy mountain bike frame from the early 90’s, I definitely saw the potential in the sport.
After that little lesson, Dewey taught me how to do the cyclocross dismount. It’s a little more complicated than simply getting off your bike because you want to keep moving and not come to a standstill. Fortunately, I’ve had that move down pat for the past ten years or so. Even in cute flats.
Now what?
I’ve got my cyclocross bike, I’ve got my in-town coach (Thanks Greg!) and my out-of-state coach ready to help. This past Saturday, I made the challenge a reality, paid my dues and signed up with a local team. The team is affiliated with the Boulder Cycle Sport shop and comes highly recommended. (Thanks Greg!) One of the perks of the team is that they have a tent at local Boulder races where you can get your bike worked on before/after the race. For someone like me, that itself is worth the price of the team.
They mean the royal We, right?
Not to mention there are training rides, weekly coaching clinics and many muscular men in Spandex like-minded athletes. If nothing else, I’ll be motivated to cheer my teammates on (because I love obnoxious yelling more than the next person!) and will have the resources necessary to set myself up for success my first season of cyclocross.
And when I say success, I’m not talking podium success…simply surviving-the-season success.
Starting soon, I’ll be learning a new sport and it may end up being something else that I suck at. But it’s time to find out and to see how my core strength holds up on a cyclocross course, how I hold up on my bike and how my clavicle holds up during a race.
(I haven’t broken a bone yet and would hate to start with my first season of cyclocross…*cough* Greg Keller *cough*…)
And you know what, cyclocross might also turn out to be a sport and physical activity that I totally love. I mean, we are talking about a combination of bikes, running and mud here.
But it does sum up nicely how I felt after this Paleo challenge, the second one I’ve done this year. (To refresh your memory…Paleo means no sugar, no grains and no dairy. Yes to meat, yes to veggies and yes to fruit.)
I felt weak.
I cheated once a week during the five-week challenge.
I didn’t punish myself for cheating and there was definitely no guilt. To put it simply, I just wasn’t very into it. (It’s not you Paleo, it’s me!) Maybe it’s because, as my Paleo partner aptly observed, now that we know we can do it, we question why we’re doing it again.
It’s the money and glory you get with winning.
Not really.
I did accomplish everything I wanted to during this challenge…running a faster Bolder Boulder and getting stronger. (I’m not unassisted pull-up strong. Yet. But I’m getting there.)
I just didn’t enjoy denying myself this time around. Surprise, surprise. Each time I cheated, it was because of a celebration I was taking part in…a wedding reception, a new pizza oven, a successful race…and I wanted to be indulging. As part of the festivity. And as part of life.
I didn’t learn as much this time as the first time I tried Paleo, but there were a few things that I should mention about the past five weeks…
I’m still in love with coconut milk. That hasn’t changed. And I may have actually drank some if it straight out of the can. Ahem. No judgments…when you’re talking Paleo desserts, you’re not talking about much. I enjoyed many, many bowls of berries and coconut milk without ever growing weary of the stuff.
Much more cooking on my part this challenge. A combination of factors made this happen, but I’m glad I was able to take the reins and try some new things in the kitchen. I do know how to cook, I’m just woefully out-of-practice.
Even though he said he wasn’t going to do this challenge with me, my husband is just so darn supportive that he couldn’t NOT do it with me. I’m pretty sure he didn’t eat Paleo during the day (proof being the french fry container I found in our car’s cupholder) but at night, he was still cooking Paleo and taking my dietary needs into consideration. For the record, he never ate any ice cream in front of me. (Well, except for that one fancy dinner out with my parents…but it was his birthday…and I’ve almost totally forgotten about it…)
We were still limited to only 4 drinks a week but potato vodka was on the list of allowed alcoholic beverages this go-around. (Still not exactly sure why since we couldn’t eat potatoes…but I didn’t want to ask too many questions when it came to alcohol. I knew I’d be needing it.) But with the inclusion of potato vodka, I found this little number to be the perfect Paleo cocktail: a bloody mary. The Kitchen makes their own tomato juice and it was easily the best bloody mary I’ve ever had…Paleo or no Paleo.
In related news, brunch is the best meal to enjoy outside of your own kitchen while on Paleo.
So even with my lackluster motivation this challenge, I still ended up achieving some pretty good results.
I lost 5 pounds and 2 inches off my hips. In post-Paleo workouts, I lifted more and performed better than I had pre-Paleo.
And…my partner and I came in fifth place out of all the teams taking part in the challenge. (You can read his recap of Paleo 2.0 here.) Which means we didn’t get any money, but we did make it onto the podium.
While I’ve been slowly easing out of Paleo…a nibble of expensive gouda here, a french fry there…I know that moving forward, there’s no way I can go back to mindless eating. Life’s too short to not pay attention to what you’re putting in your mouth and what effect it has on your body.
Which is just another way of saying yes, you can buy me a beer now.
Due to the fact that my husband worked late four nights this past week, I was forced to cook by, and for, myself. I rose to the occasion and rocked out my first roasted chicken. My husband did not disappoint either with Paleo versions of two of our favorite dishes.
Some culinary highlights from last week:
The shinier the bird, the more delicious.
–My motherf’n roasted chicken. As I mentioned above, this was a first for me. I took the guts out (fortunately, they were already bagged up for me), shoved a half-onion and a few garlic cloves up in there, and basted every twenty minutes. The husband said that I shouldn’t expect all chickens to turn out this well. I owe it all to the Savory Spice Shop. We got a kit of Colorado spices as a wedding gift (thanks Jacq!) and I swear that those spices help get me through the Paleo challenge by making everything taste better.
Banana's hipper and healthier cousin.
–Plantains. Sigh. Once I confirmed they were Paleo, I cooked them up in some coconut oil and longed for the Tropics. Plantains are really good, give me a bit of sweet and are currently the closest thing to a comfort food I have these days.
–Coconut cream. You read that right. Last challenge I was all about the coconut milk. After a trip to Pacific Ocean Marketplace, an Asian grocery store in Broomfield, I discovered my latest obsession. Coconut cream. And yes, it’s just as delicious as it sounds. Fluffier and fattier than coconut milk, coconut cream is the Holy Grail of Paleo desserts. Easily worth the trip back to the Asian grocery. And the weird smells you encounter while there.
The slaw is overshadowed by the burger. Again.
–Paleo coleslaw. This stuff is super easy to make, good for at least two meals and just one of those classic side dishes. I use Lemonaise in my slaw and this last batch even received a compliment from a co-worker. Pictured above with one of my other most favorite Paleo meals: a burger topped with a fried egg, avocado and salsa verde. Oh my.
–Justin’s Nut Butter. I want to marry almond butter. And ever since the last Paleo challenge, I’ve been doing a little almond butter research, comparing and contrasting different brands. What I’ve discovered is that Justin’s Nut Butter really is better. (Duh.) It’s also more expensive. But since I have to enjoy the little treats during this challenge, a spoonful of almond butter is worth every penny.
Extreme closeup. Which makes me hungry.
–Chili verde con pollo. In other words, a chicken green chili stew. My husband scored big with this one, putting avocado and fresh cilantro on top. I didn’t miss the cheese, sour cream or tortillas. Much. And the best part is that we made a big batch and had enough for lunch the next day. Double score.
–Paleo quiche. You read that correctly. By laying prosciutto down in a basket-like weave around the bottom of a foil pie pan, adding sesame seeds and baking the whole thing for a bit, we effectively created a crust substitute. Then, he poured the egg, sausage and broccoli mixture on top and baked like a normal quiche. It worked, proving that you really don’t *need* crust.
(The cheating incident I refer to in the title involved a wood-burning pizza oven from Italy, good friends, threats of violence and perhaps a bit of peer pressure. Let’s leave it at that.)
To make Paleo matters worse, my partner in this challenge keeps sending me direct messages telling me how much weight he’s lost. With two cheats under my belt, I’m starting to feel a little like the weak link. So I’m publicly apologizing to Andrew and promising him that I’ll be better in the second half of the challenge.
(Although, in my defense, I didn’t have nearly the same kind of weight to lose as he did. See that? Right after the public apology, I publicly call him a porker. )
To sum up week two, as I’m apt to say around the office…fuck sugar.** Halfway there, kiddo. You can do it.
This first week of the Paleo challenge was a difficult one, I cannot lie. But before we get to the rough stuff, let’s celebrate the best meal of the week.
We kicked off the first day of Paleo with a Middle Eastern feast consisting of lamb kabobs, veggie kabobs and baba ghanoush. Since this dish always gets so many rave reviews (even without the pita bread, hummus, and feta cheese), I thought I would share how to make this very easy and complete dinner. Paleo peeps, you’re welcome. Everyone else, you are too.
Lamb (or other protein) Kabobs
3/4 C raw pistachios
1 lb. ground lamb
1 t cumin
1/4 C diced onion
salt
pepper
1-2 cloves of garlic
fresh herbs (parsley/oregano/whatever you got)
1. In food processor, mix pistachios, cumin, onion, garlic, herbs, salt and pepper. When thoroughly chopped together, transfer the mixture into a large bowl, add in lamb and mix.
2. Shape into kabobs around a grilling skewer, throw on the grill and enjoy.
Chop up some vegetables for veggie skewers and you’ve got an easy and delicious side dish. After you’ve made the kabobs, rinse out the food processor and then make some baba ghanoush.
Baba Ganoush (spelled with or without the second ‘h’ it turns out)
eggplant
tahini
salt
pepper
lemon juice
olive oil
garlic
1. cut eggplant in half and cook on a baking sheet for an hour at 350 degrees. After cooling, skin the eggplant, putting the guts inside the food processor.
2. Add in tahini, olive oil, garlic, lemon juice, salt and pepper to taste while processing eggplant. You want the baba ganoush to be slightly on the thicker side. When done mixing, let baba ganoush chill for a bit before serving.
That was Monday. Unfortunately, it all goes downhill from there.
Tuesday…I met an old blogging friend who was stopping in Denver for the night. Had a glass of wine and dinner at the bar. Dinner consisted of olives. Fought the urge to stop by my favorite burrito place on the way home and ended up eating a hardboiled egg before bed.
Wednesday…I hosted a Blog and Beers event at the Mountain Sun Pub. Due to bad planning on my part, all I had for dinner before the event was an avocado and some radishes. I caved in to the pressure of hostessing and had 8 oz. of beer there. CHEATER. I know, I know.
Thursday… BBQ lunch at Trada for Startup Week, burger–no cheese or bun please. Then, Ignite Boulder. Enough said. We snuck out at intermission, ran to Falafel King and had a Paleo-friendly dinner there. You guessed it…more lamb and baba ganoush. Of course, not as good as my husband’s but not bad in a pinch. Was tempted by the free beer at Trada and had a glass of wine at Ignite.
Friday…turned down beer at yet another Startup Week event, had a glass of wine with theladies for happy hour (also? beets sans cheese on the happy hour app menu at Salt FTW!), awesome dinner of coconut shrimp satay, sauteed Chinese broccoli and mushrooms, with fried plantains. Thai-like Paleo. Frozen strawberries and coconut milk finished things off right.
Graduated week one of Paleo...but not flawlessly.
Saturday…attended the graduation BBQ of a dear friend, was happily able to eat some of the food at this graduation celebration and also drank a glass of wine. I did not celebrate with the above cupcake, although my husband did. We baked chicken, had acorn squash and leftover Chinese broccoli.
Sunday…Paleo brunch and sunshine. A five mile run, some yard work and time to plan out what to eat for the upcoming week.
Who says you need cheese?
With a first week like this, my Paleo challenge can only get better from here on out. So far on the menu for next week, we have a whole chicken, hamburgers, fish and sausage. I’m going to take it easy on the social events, spend more time in the kitchen and quit that skipping dinner nonsense.
Here’s to a much more successful second week of Paleo!
Just when you thought it was safe to come back to my blog…well, it’s not. Mainly because I start another Paleo challenge today.
Why would I ever do such a thing? Oh, you mean besides this?
“Research has strongly associated the modern Western diet with the current epidemic levels of obesity, cardiovascular disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, osteoporosis, and cancer.”
And it turns out I really like the mindfulness and challenge that go into adhering to a strict diet.
Of course, I picked a helluva week to start this thing. I know, I know…that almost sounds like a lame excuse. But with Boulder Startup Week taking place this week and a little event called Beer and Blogs that I’m helping to facilitate, I have a schedule packed with events featuring alcohol.
(Too bad I won’t be able to drink a beer. In a microbrewery. With a bunch of strangers. Talking about blogs.)
Reason #3? I’m running the Bolder Boulder in four weeks and would love to carve just a few minutes off my time. Totally doable.
Reason #4? I want to do an unassisted pullup. Or loosely translated, I want to get stronger.
And finally…this Paleo challenge, I’m in it for the metrics. Last time, we just had pictures to document our changes. This time, we’ve weighed in, taken measurements, and done two different benchmark workouts. Can you say science experiment?
(We did take more pictures, but this time, the picture is solely used in the case of a tie.)
In case you have no idea what Paleo is, here’s an easy list of what I can and cannot eat.
Other changes this time around…
no dried fruit. I believe my coach said something to the effect of “That shit’s like candy”.
no canola oil.
butter is allowed. I repeat, butter is allowed. So if I get desperate at some point during the challenge, I reserve the right to eat a spoonful of butter.
this challenge will last five weeks.
tequila and potato vodka have been added to the list of approved alcohol; still only four drinks a week though.
teams of two. I’ve partnered up with another finalist from the last Paleo challenge and between us, there is much potential for shit-talking and ass-kicking.
no spousal support. My husband has decided not to join me on this adventure and knows that there will be repercussions for eating ice cream in front of me. It could get ugly.
Goodbye. For now.
That’s what my challenge looks like starting today, but what does Paleo 2.0 mean for you?
More talk about eating real food, more documenting the struggle and more sharing of recipes this go-around. According to my Lijit stats, someone keeps searching for Paleo stuffed mushrooms. Since that was one of my favorites from the last Paleo challenge, I plan on making it again AND posting the recipe here.
I have one successful Paleo challenge under my belt (top five finalist, right here)–so I know I can do it.
The question this time is can I do it without my husband. And without pissing off my new co-workers. Or killing my partner.
Stay tuned. Things are about to get interesting. At least as interesting as carb-free can get.
I remember the first event in my life that made me start to hate my butt. It was Freshman Honors English class and the teacher asked me to diagram a sentence on the blackboard. I walked up there confidently (my diagramming skillz are legendary) and got to work. As I was finishing, I heard a voice come from the back of the room.
“Tara’s got a big ol’ butt…I know I told you I’d be true…but Tara’s got a big ol’ butt…and I’m leaving you.”
Shawn Senter, popular football player, was serenading me with the lyrics to LL Cool J’s song as I stood with my back to the class.
It amazes me that after seventeen years, this event and the feelings it brought up, remain crystal clear in my memory. How is that even possible when I can’t remember where I put my keys?
Despite this high school trauma, I’ve had an amazing revelation since then.
I love my body.
In fact, I said that very phrase out loud to my husband the other morning. I realized that it was, quite literally, the first time in my life that I said it AND meant it.
(After I said it, my husband responded that he, too, loves my body. So cute, that one.)
It’s a little sad that it took me thirty-four years to fully embrace my junk. But is it all that surprising, really?
Negative body talk surrounds us. From snippets of complaining I overhear to images and posts I see online, women are unhappy with their bodies. Whether it’s the off-hand comment about losing five pounds or the demeaning joke about the pear shape of your body, it seems like this body unhappiness seeps into many conversations I have with my friends.
And it’s not just my friends.
“In one American survey, 81% of ten-year-old girls had already dieted at least once. A recent Swedish study found that 25% of 7 year old girls had dieted to lose weight – they were already suffering from ‘body-image distortion’, estimating themselves to be larger than they really were. Similar studies in Japan have found that 41% of elementary school girls (some as young as 6) thought they were too fat. Even normal-weight and underweight girls want to lose weight.”
I’m tired of it.
My strong and powerful glutes (the gluteus maximus, minimus and medius are the major muscles in your butt) made all of the following possible…
1000 miles backpacking
7 half-marathons
1 marathon
2 triathlons
7 Bolder Boulder 10k races
1 24-hr. mountain bike race
1 100-mile road bike race
5 summits of 14,000+ peaks
skiing black diamond runs
Call it my booty resume.
But besides the impressive list of achievements above, what else has changed my mind and caused me to embrace my body now?
Two things: my husband is an ass-man and CrossFit. The fact that I hear on a daily basis how much my husband loves my ass (and that he can’t keep his hands off of it) has had an amazing effect on the negative feelings I used to harbor towards my backside. When someone loves a part of me that much, who am I to hate it?
And because of CrossFit, I’m much stronger now than I’ve ever been. The ability to deadlift like a champ, perform 150 squats and box jump with the best of them have made me love my body in a whole new way. My glutes are the basis of an amazing amount of functional strength and I honestly feel like I can do anything, physically, that I put my mind (and my ass) to.
Plus now that women are buying butt enhancers and having surgery to plump up their behinds, who’s singing the praises of my ass now, Shawn?
The average TOTAL cost of butt augmentation with fat injections, (the brazilian butt lift) averages $16,000-$18,000.
Echoing the famous words of Six Mix-a-lot, I too like big butts and I cannot lie. But enough about my booty…how’s yours?
