Tall Tara

Ever since I got married, it’s the question I get asked the most. Am I going to change my name?

I never have a good answer to that one.

photo credit: duncan

I’ve been married before and I’ve changed my name before. It wasn’t an easy process or one I enjoyed. Same goes for switching back to my maiden name after the divorce.  (He politely asked me to not keep his name and I was more than happy to oblige.) In case you lost count, that’s already two times that I’ve changed my name. Oh, twenties, how much you taught me.

However, this time it’s different. The last time I changed my name, I wasn’t doing much of anything online and I definitely wasn’t working in the tech industry. I didn’t have a profile set up under my name on tons of services or any idea that “Google juice” actually existed. A digital footprint wasn’t something I thought about.

Which leads me to the Marriage 2.0 question…do I change my name this time around?

Now don’t get me wrong. I’m nothing close to a page rank queen because I’m defintely not the only Tara Anderson around. There is an amazingly talented crafter (who beat me to the username on Flickr and takes wonderful photos), an OB/GYN doctor in Illinois, a public radio producer in New York City and a few profiles on MySpace.

Let’s not forget the struggling actress and the  list-maker, both of whom besides sharing my name, also share similar passions with me. Don’t even get me started on the hot swimsuit entrepreneur currently living in Romania.

But the thing is…I like my name.

After a little online research into the subject, another point surfaced. There are no other Tara Calihmans out there. If I took my husband’s last name, I could own the space. I go from an Anderson to a Calihman, keeping myself still in the first half of the alphabet and with the same number of letters, but I become the only Tara Calihman.

Even more online research brings me to one of my favorite women. Turns out Penelope Trunk has changed her name four times, which makes my two name changes seem like child’s play.

photo by: slavin fpo

But this possible increase in the search results comes at what cost? Having to change my name on not just all of my physical accounts but also on all of my viral ones, getting the word out to people I know and building my Google cred from the bottom. Oy. Just the thought of it makes my head hurt with visions of form after form, lost pieces of mail and a weird kind of online anonymity that might end up hurting the chances of someone looking for me. (On a related geeky note, do I have to retag everything?)

Like so many other things about the beginning of a new life, this question is just the tip of the iceberg.  If I don’t change my  name, what happens when we have kids? Do we become that annoying couple with a hyphenated last name that becomes too long to fit on forms? Does my husband change his name or do we decide to buck tradition and pick a new last name together? Does my name have anything to do with my identity beyond the realm of Google? What is a name anyway?

And of course, why is this something I’m even worrying about? You don’t see guys writing posts like these.

Help me out and shine some light on this one, oh smart ladies of the internet. What do you think, or better yet–what have you done about changing your name after marriage?